Thursday, May 26, 2011

Commissioner Armchair's Mission Statement

A Mission Statement from the new Commissioner of Major League Baseball:  Mr. Armchair.

Good Evening.  When does our past time become out dated?  Remember that question. 

I would first like to say that I'm honored and humbled to be named the new Commissioner of Major League Baseball.  I pledge to you that I will do my best to represent the game to the best of my abilities, and please know that I share the same love and excitement for the game of baseball as any another fan and kid does. 
I love Baseball because it is filled with rich tradition and history.  There is nothing like going and sitting in the bleachers at a Baseball field (stadium, park, wherever…) and take in a day game while eating a hotdog and drinking a cold one.  Baseball is America’s past time.  It’s as American as apple pie.  The first ever recorded baseball game was June 19th, 1846, in Hobeken, New Jersey, and I bet the sun was shining bright and the grass was freshly cut.  The game is still played as beautiful and pure today as it was in Hobeken.  Not a lot of rules, written or unwritten, have changed since then; and much has been done to keep baseball that way.  Which is why I'm here today.  The state of our game is in need of a change. 
The biggest traditionalist of the game of baseball is Commissioner Bud Selig.  For all who don’t think highly of him (two thumbs pointing at this guy), he has been adamant and steadfast about keeping baseball set in its ways.  That regime is over now.  The game of baseball needs a tune-up.  Every now and then, you need to take a step back and asset how the game is being played, and what can be done to make it better.  The purest will argue that the game is fine the way it is.  I'm here to tell you that is not the case.  The game of baseball needs a face lift, which will in turn vastly improve the play and the game.  I have three rule changes that I will be making that will improve the game of baseball, while making it more appealing to watch, and bringing the game into the 21st century.   
Rule Change #1:  Expand instant replay to include all judgment calls.  This includes:  close plays at bases, tag outs, determining if a ball is fair or foul, determining if a home run has left the field of play, and if a catch has been made.  A bang, bang play, or an umpire not visually able to make a call, will no longer determine the outcome of a baseball game.  There are enough cameras stationed around the ballpark and playing field that capture nearly every angle of every play.  Let's use this to our advantage and make the correct call.  Yes, I knowledge that there is a human element to the game, but humans can be wrong.  And if a call can be corrected, let's make that correct call for the sake of the game. I know St. Louis Cardinals fans will embrace this change, as they surely remember Game 6 of the 1985 World Series.   
Rule Change #2:  Home plate umpires will not be making balls and strikes calls anymore.  Baseball will be embracing technology.  We will now be setting up a sensory system around home plate that will create a standard, consistent strike zone, and if a ball is thrown within that zone, it's a strike.  If not, it's a ball.  We will have an official monitor of the balls and strikes system, and he/she will control the system from a booth easily accessible to the home plate umpire.  The official can then relay the call of the pitch to the home plate umpire via a mechanical devise, so that the home plate umpire can replay the count to the batter, catcher, and pitcher.  If the system were to shut down or become inoperable during the game, then the home plate umpire will resume the duties of calling balls and strikes.  Umpires have demonstrated that they are unable to consistently call balls and strikes in an appropriate manner.  Inconsistency in this aspect of our game is becoming a detriment, and something needs to be done to fix it.  Home plate umpires will continue to be responsible for making safe, out, and obstruction (see rule change #3) calls with regards to plays at the plate.   
Rule Change #3 (two-part change):  Baserunners will no longer be able to take aim at the catcher and cause a collision with the catcher in an attempt to dislodge or break up a close play at homeplate.  Also, catchers will no longer be able to protect or block the side of homeplate, preventing a baserunner from getting to homeplate safely.  Technically, this is already a rule in baseball, we are just actually going to enforce it.  It's Rule 7.06, obstruction.  When a fielder illegally hinders a baserunner, the fielder is guilty of obstruction.  There are two types of obstruction:  type A and type B.    The two types pertain to whether or not the obstructed runner is being played upon.  But in regards to the rule change, Baseball will be following in the same footsteps as football when it comes to protecting defenseless players.  When a baserunner is coming from third at full speed, charging down upon a catcher who is in a standstill, compromising position, he is deemed a defenseless player, and therefore the baserunner can no longer take aim upon the catcher.  If he does, he is ruled out automatically.  In the same manner, catchers without the ball can no longer block the front of the plate to prevent the baserunner from reaching homeplate safely.  Obstruction will be called on the catcher and homeplate will be awarded to the baserunner.  Catchers can position themselves out in front of the plate to receive the throw, make the catch, and then apply the tag.  If the catcher doesn't have the ball, he must remain out in front of homeplate so that he doesn't obstruction the baserunner coming into homeplate. 
I understand these new rule changes will be met with great opposition.  However, I feel that they in no way compromise the integrity and the purity of the game of baseball.  If anything, these rule changes strengthen the integrity and purity of baseball.  We want every aspect of our game to be perfect and called correctly in every fashion.  If we have the ability to do so with the help of technology, then we will use it.  Our past time has become out dated.  And my first goal is to bring it up to date.  Thank you.

Mr. Armchair Speaking           

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